Sunday, January 22, 2012

Unconditional?

A friend shared a picture on her Facebook wall. The picture said: "A person who truly loves you will never let you go no matter how hard the situation is." When I saw it, it hit me at full force. Despite the fact the statement ended with a preposition, it's profound...and true. The statement just clarifies the meaning of unconditional love. Unconditional love is a grand idea that supports the notion of loving someone no mater the circumstances. But is it real...or just an illusion?

This year David and I have faced a huge challenge and several life changes. We were apart most of the year and, although we had small amounts of time together, I found myself missing him and the little things that make our time together so very special. There's an old saying: "Absence makes the heart grow fonder". In some cases, absence just drives a wedge between people. But in our case, I found that this old saying is true.

I know if this separation would have happened in past years, it would have put a terrible strain on our relationship. But having been together through many hard times, and many more wonderful times, we survived and now I feel we're stronger than ever. When our love was less mature, these tests and trials would have pushed both of us to fight and squabble. But now, since our love has matured and is stronger, we support each other easily. When I'm weak, he is strong. And when he's having a bad day, I am there to help him through it. We've found a good balance, and it's the strongest we've ever been.

Don't get me wrong. There are times when we're not at our best. Times when our emotions are raw and stress is high. Sometimes our talks are rushed and hurried, and we snap trying to get the other to listen. Sometimes we disagree and middle ground eludes us. But in the end, we find that forgiveness comes easily...and that's the key.

I love David unconditionally. Some of the things we've faced have often made me wonder what I'm doing here. Some things I've done have made him second-guess his choice to be with me. But when the dust clears, we've decided our love is stronger than our circumstances or our situations.

When I'm old and feeble, I want it to be him who helps me get around. When he's old and forgetful, I want to be the one who reminds him of all the wonderful times we've spent together. When our life gets close to the end, it's him I want to look back with and laugh about all the hard times we made it through. And better than that, I know without a doubt that he feels the same.

He wrote me a lovely note around Christmas this year. I cried when I read it, and it was the best present he could have given me. I won't share the entire letter, but here is some of what he wrote me:

"I woke up early this morning and started writing you. I want to tell you some things. As always I love you, but also I'm proud of you too! Thank you for being my wife and sticking through everything with me! We definitely have a wonderful life ahead of us! I promise as always to love and cherish you and not forsake you! I hope you already know these things, but I'm going to keep telling you as long as I'm alive! You're a gift to me, Misty. The best present ever!

I love you, Babe. You're my Pickle...don't ever forget that. Forever is not long enough!"
How could I not love him unconditionally? Flaws, issues, annoying habits and all...I'll love him until the end.

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